Monday 13 January 2014

ouch*

I touched on the heartache of saying our goodbyes to Ducky each week in my last post but this weekend it again rose as a devastating ache that has haunted me & Gary since. Darcey has assured us she is happy at mummys house but she so desires to live with us. Im sure this is not uncommon in split family homes when the child doesnt live in her secondary home as much as the primary. We after much talking are convinved this also is not just an attention seeking ploy. Darcey is getting extremly distressed with the go to & from of her two homes. Her words were "Its just so hard for me." This breaks me. A six year old should not feel hardship & sadness on this level, but poor angel boo does & that is something that obviously does not settle well with us as parents. But unfortunatly finding a solution is not prooving easy as Ducky is being asked on her mothers side to just accept this is her situation & not cry for long on it. She is being called silly when the door is opened to her & she is showing upset, there is no open arms of understanding or empathy & as you can imagine dropping her off in such distress unsure of she will recieve comfort is becoming unbareable. We just dont know what to do. I am currently writing her a visual photo book to help her understand how her families become entwined, we are civil & kind to her mum always & I often encourage talk from how she feels in all of her routines, school, home life & friends etc. She is so open & honest now, so unguarded. She is easily comforted with a good chat & huge snuggly cuddles. But this is just different & we are just so stressed. We want what is best for Darcey. My sister came up with some ideas to help boo understand & be comforted at both homes but as of now we are unable to do these great ideas as her mum does not feel Darcey has a deep rooted upset & she simply just misses her daddy. Her tears were too strong for just that, her own words too easily slurred through hiccups, she is uncomfortable with the divide. So a solution is needed & fast. Me & Jasper will be getting her from school this week for a hot chocolate & daddy hopes to leave work early to join us, but there is always the goodbye. Has anyone experiences this?? What do we do?? Love & light for my little darling girly, why does it have to be so painful for you sweet darling, bless u angel. The stars sprinkle kisses down on you honey pie xxx 143

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